The Most Often Overlooked Step That Will Save You Time and Effort

I've talked before about how to get your ex girlfriend back and get her talking to you again, but I feel I need to stress the importance of doing this the right way to begin with. When you open up the lines of communication in a positive way, you're already smoothing the transition back into being in a relationship again. It's the easiest and most often overlooked first step to get your ex girlfriend back.

First of all, your ex may not feel the same as you do about getting back together right away, especially if she was the one to call it off. During break ups, certain things can be said and feelings can be hurt. She'll need some time apart to cool off.

If you want her back in your life, the first step is to open up the lines of communication so you can let her know that you still have feelings for her. Here's three ways to get your girlfriend back:

1. Ask your ex

The simplest way is to call her, and simply ask if there's a time you can catch up. You have to think of how she's feeling right now, and decide if you should take a less direct approach. The way I phrased it when I asked my ex was that I felt I needed to apologize to her for a few things and asked if she would meet me for lunch so I could do it face to face. She agreed. You need to decide if you want to just ask her, or be a little more gentle about the subject and use the second approach.

2. Ask a friend

If your ex is still upset and not talking with you after your call, ask one of your friends that both of you trust. Let them know that they can help if they want to, but you're not forcing them to. Be honest with them about your feelings and that you want to get your girlfriend back. Ask them to simply go to your ex and have a little chat to see if there is any way that you can make up for your mistakes and fix the problems that led to your break up. You don't want your friend to pressure your ex, just get her to think about having you back, and share the reasons that she would accept that.

3. Write it down

If the first 2 approaches fail, write a letter to your ex about how you feel. Keep it short, sweet, and sincere. Don't just pour your feelings out, let her know what you want, why you want it, and how it will be different from last time. Leave the letter for 24 hours and then read over it again. Make sure that it's still something that you want them to read, or else rewrite it and leave it for another 24 hours so you can read it again later. Include anything that you learned from step 1 or 2 and again keep it short, sweet, and sincere. When you're happy with the letter, make sure it gets where you want it to, deliver it by hand. Apologize and show her that you know you made mistakes and that you hurt her. Ask her to read the letter and let you know if there is anything you can do to make it up to her.

The most important thing to remember is that she is trying to get some space, so give her some. Don't bother her over and over again, just let her know that you're ready for her when she's prepared to give it another shot.

So get her talking again, and then you can move on to building up your relationship from casual to personal again. I'd like to invite you to check out a complete blueprint that takes you step-by-step through the process of getting back your true love.
You can check it out here on the home page of my How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back blog.